Our Tammy

Last Wednesday, March 30th 2011, we got the phone call that would change our families' lives forever.

Our sweet sister, Tammy, passed away unexpectedly in her sleep due to causes that are still unknown. It will probably be a few weeks yet before we know exactly why. All we know is that we lost a dear wife, mother, daughter, sister, grandmother, niece and friend.

The family gathered at her house immediately after we got the news on Wed night. Lots of hugs and tears were shared as we tried to let the shock settle. Still, it all feels surreal. Her great neighbors brought pizza, drinks, chairs and blankets and even firewood as we tried to stay warm outside. Nobody was allowed in the house until the Police went through and took pictures & wrote their report...which basically was all night.

Tammy was the oldest of seven children. Chet's big sister. She loved her family and especially adored her little brothers, Chet & Cody.

She was not only beautiful, she was funny, witty, crafty, and had quite the sense of humor...

For example, when she talked about "groceries" she wasn't talking about food you buy at the store. Nope, it was in reference to certain male "anatomy".

When she thought something was incredible, she wouldn't describe it as "wonderful" or "amazing".... instead, "orgasmic" was the term that she always enjoyed most.

She hated feet and thought they were all ugly and gross, EXCEPT for her own. She had the only perfect foot out there.

She loved Johnny Cash, Aerosmith and U2 and her love of 80's rock rubbed off on Chet as a very young child. Here are some of his favorite memories of her:

* "I can attribute my love of hard rock music and probably music in general to Tammy. I remember her listening to Aerosmith as a kid all the time and thinking it was the coolest thing I’d ever heard. Going along with this theme, I know she was ever so proud of me when at about 4 or 5 years old, she taught my Primary class. I was asked to come up and tell a favorite song of mine to sing. Instead of “Do as I’m Doing” or “Child of God”, I promptly threw out a favorite from KISS of mine. Mom wasn’t so proud, but I know Tammy was! "

* "I remember Tammy used to take me over to Bingham high school when she was a Sr. and I was maybe only 5 or 6. She used to take me around to all her friends and I used to remember how cool she was to go there and have so many friends."

* "I can remember while she was tending, she would have these sessions called something like “Guess what it is”. Where she would send all of us in the other room, and she would make up some concoction for us to eat or drink and we had to take it on faith that it was good. When the other kids did it, it usually was ok. But when Tammy did it, you never knew if you were going to be eating a mustard shake, or spoonful of baking soda!"

* "When I got married, one of the things I appreciated from Tammy the most was how she treated my Wife, like she was not an in law, but an actual Sister. And she has done so ever since. That made me feel so great that she took her in like one of our own and loved her the same as she did me."

* "Every July 4th and 24th, she and I would have a "firework battle". I would light off the firework show on the 4th at mom's and she would do her show on the 24th at her place. We were always trying to see who could out do the other...even adding music at one point."

* "Tammy and I would bump heads sometimes, but that’s probably because we are so much alike. Both hard headed and stubborn. But I hope she knows how much I look up to her and always have as the oldest of the 7 of us, and how very much I respected her for leading us by example by marrying in the Temple. I love Tammy very much and will miss her more than she could ever imagine possible. But I hope she realizes it now how very loved and respected she was and is."

Some of my favorite memories of her and things she taught me:

* I could always tell when Tammy had one of my babies for a while because I would always get them back smelling like Baby Magic baby lotion (and it HAD to be Baby Magic) and sporting her signature “Tammy-do" (Joseph Smith style- The top combed into a fauxhawk with a slight curl, bangs coming down with a slight swoosh to the side and the sides of the hair combed forward toward the cheeks!) or her "Man-boy" do.

* Since knowing Tammy, I will never look at a “Chia Pet” the same way ever again….Every time I see one I think of a certain girl with “big hair” and always hear Tammy’s voice in my head singing “ Cha, cha, cha, CHIA!”

* Moses, Moses, MOSES! From The Ten Commandments.

* She taught me that hot glue is better than duct tape when it comes to “fixing” everything.

* She taught me that a dishwasher and mailbox really do look cute with black cow spots painted all over them.

* When we were on our first cruise as a family, the first formal night a few of us girls went to the ship salon to have our hair done and we all walked out with horrible hair. So, on the second formal night Tammy spent almost 2 hrs doing my hair. I thought I was going to die from asphyxiation or at least have brain damage from the fumes of all the hair spray she used…but my hair was beautiful and I admired her so much that she would spend so much time getting me ready leaving herself barely enough time to throw on her dress and get to dinner on time.

* Speaking of cruises, on our second one as a large family our ship was hit with a huge gust of wind. It was strong enough to begin tipping our ship sideways, emptying all the pools...SCARY! Tammy was out on deck with lounge chairs flying all around her and was almost blown away because she was so worried about saving her BINGO cards!

* As Chet mentioned before, She always treated me like a sister and not an “in-law”. Being the only girl in my family and always longing for sisters I appreciated this very much! She always told me how she loved me and how I was a sister not a sister-in-law to her. Thank you Tammy, for being the big sister that I always wanted but never had growing up.

Memories from Kylee-

* "On the 24^th of July one year as she was lighting fireworks for her Big Show a spark flew into her hair and it started to smoke. She went around screaming patting her head and everybody just watched her and laughed instead of helping her."

* "Belting out “O Holy Night” operetta style (two octaves too high) while Christmas Caroling in a way that only Aunt Tammy can."

* "At about 6 years old, while staying with Aunt Tammy while my parents were gone, I had a Barbie CD rom that my parents bought me to keep me busy and Aunt Tammy was supposedly “helping” me with it but really was having a lot more fun playing with it than I was…probably b/c she wouldn’t let me design my Barbie and the scenery and did what she wanted instead."

(fun photos of Tammy)

Kissing a stingray in the Cayman Islands

Tulum Mexico
Shellie, Tammy & Myself

The most recent photos taken in the last week...

As "Rae Porter", a reporter at our Murder Mystery Dinner on the 18th of March.

And with her incredible husband, Glen, at Chet's 40th Birthday party on March 19th.
(a bit blurry which makes me crazy...oh well, but notice his orange shirt? Keep reading!)

I was having a very hard time deciding on a date for Chet's party and thought of doing it in April, but really wanted to do it in March so I went with the week before his birthday instead of after. I am SO very glad now that I did, because that was the last time most of the family saw her.

Tammy would always ask the nieces and nephews who their "favorite Aunt" was...always giving them "the look" so that they didn't dare say anybody but her.

Hence, she became known as the "fun Aunt" so, it was only appropriate that it was put on her flowers from the kids for her funeral.


Tammy's Obituary:

TAMERA BALLARD

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Tamera Lynn Ballard 1959 ~ 2011 Tamera (Tammy) Lynn Fullmer Ballard returned to her Heavenly Father's care on March 30, 2011. She left peacefully in her sleep after courageously battling ongoing health issues. Tammy was born on April 7, 1959 to Jay and Marilyn Fullmer, the oldest of seven children. She cherished family above all and enjoyed a happy childhood with her brothers and sisters and was exceedingly proud of her family's boxing legacy. Tammy was outgoing and clever and was known by her family as 'Fun Aunt Tammy'. Always the one to poke fun, she often referred to herself as not short, but 'tall for her height'. She was a beautician, a craft-queen and most of all a wonderful mother and grandmother. Tammy and her husband Glen were sealed for time and all eternity in the Salt Lake City Temple on June 23, 1978 and raised their family in West Jordan. With Glen, she shared in her greatest accomplishment, raising four beautiful children who are grateful for the legacy of love, compassion and service that she has left behind. Tammy is survived by her children Shanna (Travis), Beau (Evonne), Shay (Tiffany) and Brienna (Sam); her eleven grandchildren (her 'angels') Shantell, Braeden, Tatum, Jakelle, Hayden, Kehlden, Layne, Kelsie, Greydie, Brylee and Cierra; her mother and father, two sisters, four brothers and many nieces and nephews. She was preceded in death by her maternal and paternal grandparents. Funeral services will be held on Monday at 11 a.m. in the Prairie Stake Building 7000 S. Clernates Drive (5325 W.), West Jordan. Friends may call Sunday evening from 6-8 p.m. at the Broomhead Funeral Home 12600 S. 2200 W. in Riverton and Monday one hour prior to services at the church. www.broomheadfuneralhome.com

Published in Deseret News on April 2, 2011

It has been a really rough week as you can imagine. This was the first death to happen to a close family member in Chet's family. Chet has had a very hard time and it breaks my heart to see him so upset.

The funeral was wonderful. Tammy's kids talked and the musical numbers were wonderful. It really could not have gone any better. I know that she is so proud of her family and the service that was held for her.

These are flowers for a "fun Aunt",

For a Daughter,

For a mother,

and for a sister.

Tammy hated Glen in the color orange...probably because everything he wore was orange. He would leave for work and come home from work in orange.(he works for the city) He is a hunter and even when he's not working or hunting he still finds a way to wear an orange golf shirt or button down shirt.

So, the flower spray covering her casket was made up of all white roses and a white ribbon with a single orange rose in the middle.

Graveside

Chet was asked to be a casket bearer as well as dedicate the grave. He was worried about being able to get through it, but he did a beautiful job!

My heart and love goes out to Glen and his kids, Shanna, Beau, Shay, Brienna and their beautiful families. My prayers will continue to be with you all!



When Kylee was born, Tammy gave her a baby ring to wear on her blessing day. Kylee wanted to wear it with a locket given to me when my mom died, (It holds Ky's baby picture in it) to Tammy's funeral as a tribute to her.

How grateful I am for the Gospel. For the Plan of Salvation and for our Savior and his Atonement. I'm thankful for the knowledge that families are forever. And I'm especially grateful to be part of such an amazing family and to also have the support of extended family and friends which help us find comfort and peace in times like these.

A month ago Tammy wrote a poem out of the blue. It was read at her funeral and placed on the back of the program. I would like to share it.

DO NOT SORROW

Do not sorrow for me because you imagine I am not here,
I am with you still, just a different plane and sphere;

Do not sorrow because of the things you think I'll have missed somehow,
I am constantly with you aware of your here and now.

Do not sorrow because you now think of life without me in dread,
Think instead of the eternity that lies for us all instead;

Do not sorrow because you think of me as cold and still,
Think instead of me as alive as you are and always will;

Do not sorrow as you look at my mortal empty glove,
Think instead of how much all of you I love.

Do not sorrow because you think I will miss your joy and pain,
Think instead of our Savior's sacrifice that makes it possible for us all to be together again.

-Tammy Ballard

Tammy loved angels and always called her grandkids "her Angels". Now, she is living among them and is our special guardian angel watching over us all from above. We will miss you Tammy! Your Coke is on it's way!!! :)